“Marriage preparation has to be seen and put into practice as a gradual and continuous process.”

St. John Paul II wrote these words in Familiaris Consortio (On the Christian Family in the Modern World). In this exhortation, he introduced the concept of a three-stage marriage preparation process: remote, proximate and immediate (Familiaris Consortio, 66). In a previous blog post, we briefly described the three stages and discussed what constitutes proper marriage preparation according to Canon law. .

Here, we will further describe the process by summarizing the pastoral document entitled, Preparation for the Sacrament of Marriage, issued by the Pontifical Council for the Family.

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Today the Church celebrates the Feast of the Holy Family. As the earthly parents of the Christ child, Mary and Joseph provide the perfect parenting models. Their commitment and obedience to God, exemplify the spirit of love for Christ that guided their lives.

When Mary wondered how it could be that she would be with child, the Angel of the Lord told her that the child would be of the Holy Spirit. Mary responded with trust and obedience (cf. Lk 1:26-38).

Joseph so deeply honored and loved Mary that he was unwilling to subject her to public humiliation So he chose instead to quietly dismiss her. When the angel assured Joseph that the baby was of God, he responded with trust and obedience. He spent his life protecting and supporting the Holy Family (cf. Mt 1:18-25).

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No one, whether shepherd or wise man, can approach God here below except by kneeling before the manger at Bethlehem and adoring him hidden in the weakness of a new-born child. (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 563)

The following is an excerpt from the homily given by Pope Benedict XVI at Midnight Mass on the Solemnity of the Nativity of the Lord, at Saint Peter’s Basilica, 24 December 2012:

Dear Brothers and Sisters!

Again and again the beauty of this Gospel [Lk 2:1-14] touches our hearts: a beauty that is the splendour of truth. Again and again it astonishes us that God makes himself a child so that we may love him, so that we may dare to love him, and as a child trustingly lets himself be taken into our arms. It is as if God were saying: I know that my glory frightens you, and that you are trying to assert yourself in the face of my grandeur. So now I am coming to you as a child, so that you can accept me and love me.

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A recent Pew Research Center Study asked respondents how important each of seven factors were to marital success. Topping the list was having shared interests, a satisfying sexual relationship and sharing household chores. Shared religious beliefs ranked fifth on the list of marriage success factors (see below).

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In the United States, the fourth Thursday of November is set aside as a day to thank God for the bountiful blessings and abundant gifts he has bestowed upon our nation. The Pilgrims, who were fleeing religious prosecution in their native England, celebrated the first thanksgiving in America in 1621, one year after arriving on the Mayflower. The tradition of celebrating a day of thanksgiving continued for many years, although inconsistently in spacing or season, until President Abraham Lincoln made it an annual national holiday in 1863.

The year that is drawing towards its close, has been filled with the blessings of fruitful fields and healthful skies. To these bounties, which are so constantly enjoyed that we are prone to forget the source from which they come, others have been added, which are of so extraordinary a nature, that they cannot fail to penetrate and soften even the heart which is habitually insensible to the ever watchful providence of Almighty God. No human counsel hath devised nor hath any mortal hand worked out these great things. They are the gracious gifts of the Most High God, who, while dealing with us in anger for our sins, hath nevertheless remembered mercy. (Abraham Lincoln’s 1863 Thanksgiving Proclamation)

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The Jubilee Year of Mercy draws to a close this Sunday, November 20, on the Solemnity of Christ the King. However, we must continue helping people personally encounter the love, kindness, generosity and incredible mercy of God. During the Year of Mercy, Pope Francis called Catholics around the world to “open wide” the doors of their hearts to forgive others.

It is in the family, where husbands and wives, mothers and fathers, guided by the Holy Spirit, model love and mercy to each other and their children. Jesus shows us how to do this; it is through forgiving those who have grievously offended us.

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“And if a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand.” (Mk 3:25)

This passage appears in all three of the Synoptic Gospels (Matthew, Mark, and Luke). Abraham Lincoln echoed these words from Scripture on June 16, 1858 to more than 1,000 delegates at the Republican State Convention in Springfield, Illinois. They had just chosen Mr. Lincoln as their candidate for the U.S. Senate, running against Democrat Stephen A. Douglas.

“A house divided against itself cannot stand.” I believe this government cannot endure, permanently half slave and half free.[1]

Lincoln’s speech was controversial; it cost him the election to Douglas. A little more than two years later, people began to grasp the truth of his words and he was elected to the Presidency of the United States on November 6, 1860.

This past week, our nation elected a new president. The election has uncovered a deep and wide divide in our nation. It has left many feeling sad, angry, and disillusioned. Others are jubilant, hopeful and encouraged. Between these extremes are many that are just fed up with the ugliness of this election. How do we bridge the biggest divide in our country since the Civil War?

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